[LISTEN TO NIKE]

I WORKED AT CURVES FOR WOMEN FOR ALMOST 4 YEARS. THE ONE I WORKED AT DURING HIGH SCHOOL AND SUMMERS AWAY FROM COLLEGE WAS ONE OF THE BEST JOBS IVE EVER HAD. WELL, LETS SAY FAVORITE JOB. MY BOSS WAS AMAZINGGGGG. SERIOUSLY, SHE WAS JUST ALWAYS SUPER HAPPY, MOTIVATING, KNEW HER BUSINESS, LOVED THE MEMBERS... YOU NAME IT, EVERYTHING YOU THINK SOMEONE WHO WOULD OWN A GYM SHOULD BE. ANYWAYS, I REMEMBER HER SAYING THIS TO A MEMBER AND ITS STUCK WITH ME EVER SINCE... "YOU HAVE TO MAKE FITNESS A PRIORITY." SHE WAS SOOOOO RIGHT! IF YOU DONT MAKE IT A PRIORITY, IT WILL ALWAYS BE ONE OF THOSE THINGS YOU CAN BE PUT OFF AND "DONE TOMORROW."

I FEEL LIKE I HAVE LET EXERCISE NOT BE A PRIORITY ANYMORE. EVER SINCE I HURT MY KNEE AND HAVEN'T BEEN ABLE TO DO MY 6-8 MILE RUNS ABOUT 3 TIMES A WEEK, IVE BEEN SUPER DEPRESSED AND UNWILLING TO TRY SOMETHING NEW. IVE BEEN EXCITED TO TRY SOMETHING NEW, BUT I HAVEN'T GONE OUT THERE AND DONE IT YET. I BELIEVE WE ARE ALL CREATURES OF HABIT. I LOVE RUNNING, SO I RUN. NOW THAT I CAN'T RUN, IM KINDA FREAKING OUT AND HESITANT TO BE HARDCORE IN A NEW SPORT.

IM CHANGING ALL OF THIS TODAY. I FINALLY FOUND A GYM. I DONT RECALL IF I TOLD YOU ABOUT THE WHOLE YMCA SITUATION... BUT HERES A RECAP... SIGNED UP BECAUSE CHILDCARE WAS "FREE" ONLY TO FIND OUT THAT IT WASNT FREE AT THE PARTICULAR YMCA I SIGNED UP AT, SO I CANCELLED. WAS SUPER DEPRESSED AFTER THAT. WELL A COUPLE OF DAYS AGO I JUST TOLD MYSELF TO FIND A GYM, EVEN IF I JUST WENT ON THE DAYS THAT RYAN HAD CAELUM. OF COURSE THE 2 24HR FITNESSES THAT I LOOKED INTO IN ENCINITAS (MY FUTURE HOME) DIDN'T HAVE POOLS. BOO. SO I LOOKED INTO LA FITNESS, AND THIS ONE HAD A POOL! YAY! ANDDDD  THEY HAVE UNLIMITED CHILDCARE FOR ONLY AN EXTRA $10 A MONTH! SO STOKED! I AM SIGNING UP TODAY! I COULDN'T BE MORE EXCITED. ITS A LITTLE FAR FROM MY APT NOW, BUT IM NOT GOING TO LET THAT STOP ME NOW.

IVE LET FITNESS SLIDE. IVE BEEN EATING BAD. AND OBVIOUSLY THOSE ARE A BAD COMBO. A COUPLE OF MONTHS AGO I FINALLY HIT MY GOAL WEIGHT, ACTUALLY I PASSED IT BY 2 LBS. 123LBS. I HAVEN'T BEEN THAT SMALL SINCE FRESHMAN YEAR OF HIGH SCHOOL! AND NOW I'M TERRIFIED TO LOOK AT THE SCALE, I'M PROBABLY UP TO MY BODY'S 'HAPPY WEIGHT' OF AROUND 130-132... TEN POUNDS! UNACCEPTABLE. I'M DISGUSTED. OBVIOUSLY MY HAPPY WEIGHT AND MY BODYS HAPPY WEIGHT IS NOT THE SAME. I JUST FEEL GOOD IN A BATHING SUIT AT AROUND 125. THAT'S MY GOAL (AGAIN).

I NEED TO FIND THAT DRIVE AND MOTIVATION I LOST SOMEWHERE. I NEED TO GET EXCITED ABOUT BUILDING MY QUAD MUSCLES TO GET MY KNEE BACK IN ORDER. I NEED TO GET STOKED ABOUT SWIMMING (WHICH I AM, BUT I THINK IM GOING TO HAVE A RUDE AWAKENING THAT I CANT DO AS MANY LAPS AS ID LIKE TO DO.... BABY STEPS JEN, BABY STEPS).

I HAVE A BIG EGO WHEN IT COMES TO FITNESS. I LOVEEEEE SAYING "I RAN 16 MILES TODAY" AND JUST LOOKING AT THE PERSONS JAW DROP. I CAN'T DO THAT ANYMORE AND IT KILLS ME. IM STOKED TO RUN 1 MILE WITHOUT PAIN. I NEED TO GET OVER MY BIG EGO AND REMEMBER TO BE EXCITED ABOUT THE LITTLE GOALS AND NOT GET DOWN ON MYSELF.

IM AWESOME AT JUSTIFYING JUST ABOUT ANYTHING. EXCUSES, EXCUSES, EXCUSES. I NEED TO STOP. BECOME SERIOUS. AND START MAKING FITNESS AND HEALTHY EATING A PRIORITY. FITNESS FIRST I SUPPOSE. IM USUALLY THE TYPE YOU HATE... THE ONES THAT CAN EAT ANYTHING, JUST BECAUSE THEY EXERCISE A LOT. I WANT TO BE THAT AGAIN. I LOVE MY FOOD. BUT THEN AGAIN I FIND WHEN I START WORKING OUT I DON'T WANT ALL THE BAD STUFF. STILL FUN TO SPLURGE SOMETIMES ;D


THANK YOU JEN (NOT ME, MY OTHER HALF) FOR BEING SUCH AN INSPIRATION! I USE CAELUM AS AN EXCUSE A LOT. JEN HAS TWO STEP KIDS... AND STILL WORKS OUT EVERYDAY. I USE BEING TIRED FROM WORK... JEN HAS HARD HOURS AND STILL WORKS OUT. AND NOT HAVING TIME? NO. I COULD WAKE UP EARLIER, I COULD WORKOUT AFTER CAE GOES TO BED. I CHOOSE NOT TO. HEALTHY LIVING/WORKING OUT IS A CHOICE. YOU CAN CHOOSE TO DO IT, OR YOU CAN CHOOSE NOT TO. OBVIOUSLY JEN IS DOING IT ALL RIGHT.

LOSING WEIGHT... NO. HAVING A HEALTHY LIFESTYLE IS HARD WORK. NO ONE EVER SAID IT WAS GOING TO BE EASY. FITNESS IS NOT FOR PANSIES. IT TAKES DEDICATION, A STRONG WILL, AND DETERMINATION TO DEFEAT TEMPATIONS AND MAKE YOURSELF A PRIORITY AGAIN. I FEEL LIKE MOST WOMEN (ESP MOMS) TAKE CARE OF EVERYONE AROUND THEM FIRST, AND PUT THEMSELVES LAST. I AM A "VICTIM" OF THIS STATE OF MIND. I HAVE TO REMEMBER THAT IF IM HAPPY THEN EVERYTHING AROUND ME SEEMS HAPPY TOO!

NO MORE! IM COMING FIRST THIS TIME. IF I TAKE A DIFFERENT ROUTE HOME FROM WORK, MY GYM IS ON THE WAY. I DONT HAVE AN EXCUSE THIS TIME. TAKE THAT, ... ME!

I DID TOOK SOME 'BEFORE' TYPE PICTURES. TALK ABOUT MOTIVATION. WITHOUT SUCKING IT IN AND ALL. I THINK ITLL BE THE PERFECT MOTIVATION TO KICK MY OWN BUTT. ANDDDD WHEN I GET BACK TO THE WEIGHT I WANT TO BE, ITLL BE NICE TO LOOK BACK AND SEE THE PROGRESS. MUCH LIKE JEN (MY OTHER HALF) DID WITH HER JOURNEY. SEEING IS BELIEVING. THANKS JEN FOR ALL THE MOTIVATION! PS MAYBE ILL BE BRAVE ENOUGH LIKE YOU TO POST BEFORE/AFTER PICTURES IN A MONTH OR TWO... ;D
AS NIKE SAYS: JUST DO IT.